A few years ago, I was deeply moved by a Korean advertisement.
In the video, several fathers were sitting in a small room, filling out a questionnaire exploring how their children express love and affection: “What is your child’s favorite food?” “How many photos of your child have you saved on your phone?” “When was the last time you told your child, ‘I love you’?” The fathers answered these questions with smiles as if they were familiar and easy to respond to.
However, when the same questions were rephrased, asking about their own fathers — “When was the last time you told your father, ‘I love you’?” “Do you know what your father’s favorite food is?” “How many photos of your father do you have?” — these fathers began to furrow their brows, deep in thought and found it difficult to answer.
It was only then that the screen cut to interviews with their own fathers, and seeing their fathers’ responses moved these fathers to tears.
Do We Really Know Our Parents?
Our parents have many stories that happened long before we were born. They have witnessed every step of our lives, yet we may only know a small part of their own journey.
As our parents grow older, these stories become increasingly important to us. We want to preserve their memories — we don’t want them to forget them.
No matter how you choose to document your parents’ life stories, the first step is simply to start the conversation. So today, I want to share four great methods to help you get the process moving.
1. Start with Old Photo Albums
I’ve found that old photo albums are a great starting point. You could spend a day with your mom or dad flipping through old family albums. You’ll discover that it not only brings back memories for them but also uncovers stories you never knew. It’s also an excellent way to gather material for a memoir or biography.
For many of us, digital photos are convenient, but the old photographs from our parents’ childhoods are often rare, and we may not have backups. These old photos are invaluable, but they can easily be lost or damaged. Fortunately, with advances in technology, it’s now much easier to preserve old photos. You can scan them online and safely store them to prevent the loss of precious memories. These photos can also be reproduced in a memoir or album. Of course, you can scan them yourself by using an app, a nearby copy shop, or purchasing a scanner.
2. Be Your Family’s Archaeologist
If you’re really committed (and brave enough), it’s time to go back to your family home and explore! As a child, I loved digging through old items in my grandparents’ house. I came across many interesting things — typewriters, rotary phones, sewing machines, cassette tapes, and more.
Just like historians spend time digging up ancient Roman pottery to understand the way people lived, material culture can tell you just as much about your family’s history. Your parents’ memories may not be entirely reliable, but by examining old keepsakes, you can bring those ancient stories back to life.
For example, you could ask, “Mom, why do you always wear that necklace?” She might respond, “I was 13, and one day I was walking to school when I bought it…”
By examining your parents’ old possessions, you can not only stir their memories but also help those stories come to life.
3. Pay Attention to the Little Details
Now that you’ve started talking to your parents, make sure you have pen and paper handy. The stories your parents and grandparents share might offer important insights into the past.
Some stories could even stretch back before your birth: “During World War II, we had to evacuate. I still remember the sound of the air raid siren.”
Or memories from a reality far removed from modern life: “I got my first job when I was 11, and I’ve been working ever since.”
Make sure to jot down these stories and remember to ask your parents thoughtful questions, perhaps using some of the ideas we’ve suggested. With your curiosity and adventurous spirit, these stories will truly come to life.
4. Through the Professional Help of StoryPatio
Of course, many of us would love to personally document our parents’ life stories, but it’s often not that easy. I often encounter clients who are eager to document their parents’ stories and may have even tried to write them, but due to the busyness of life or simply not knowing where to begin, the task often gets delayed.
This is precisely why StoryPatio exists. We can help you record your parents’ life stories in a book. Our professional writers have extensive experience interviewing clients’ parents and constructing their memoirs and biographies. We also have an in-house team of editors and project managers to manage the refinement and production of the text, ensuring that the final result is beautifully presented and your precious memories are preserved.
If you’d like to learn more about our services, please feel free to contact us.